Our Story, Part IV

(Go here for Part III.)

After that night at the fraternity party with Dan, we spent the next day (Sunday) together. I don’t remember much about it. I’m sure we studied or ate or did something fun together. Who knows! But I do remember the next night, Monday.

After classes, I invited Dan to my dorm room to study with me. (Boys were allowed in your room, but only until a certain hour.) We studied a bit, but I think we did more talking than studying. Here’s what I wrote in my diary about that day: “I told him to look into my eyes and tell me what I felt for him. So he looked into my eyes for a few seconds and asked, ‘Do you love me?’ I was completely awed! I mean, he knew! He guessed without me saying a word! I think that shows how close I think we are, doesn’t it?”

PUT THE BRAKES ON! Wow! Can you believe I actually told the guy I loved him after only “truly” knowing him for two days?! Aack! Even now, I don’t think I knew what I was saying. I might have felt infatuated by him, but I had no idea what love was at the time. (At least not compared to what I know now.)

In any case, Dan did not respond in kind. Here’s the conclusion of what I wrote in my diary: “So I told him, but he didn’t say anything back. That sort of upset me at the moment, but I realized later that it’s good he didn’t say ‘those words’ back because then he wouldn’t have meant them. By not saying it, he showed me how honest he is and that he wouldn’t say something just to say it if he didn’t truly feel it. The next morning when I got up, I thought about what I said and I realized that I was happy I had done it. Then I realized the biggest thing of all: I must truly care a whole heck of a lot for him because it didn’t bother me anymore that he didn’t say ‘I love you’ back. And that’s how I know this is real (for me, at least).”

The rest of that week was spent pretty much glued to each other’s hips. We met at the library to study and talk, and spent all our free time together. We made plans for our first real date that coming weekend, which was also the weekend of my 19th birthday. We were going to a different fraternity party on Friday night, then Saturday was the big date. He had asked me to go on his fraternity’s date party. However, it didn’t go quite as planned.

Check back later for Part V.