Joint Pain

I haven't posted in a few days for a couple of reasons.

First off, we had a busy weekend. We went down to the campsite on Saturday to play in the river and on the playground, but we didn't camp because of the pending thunderstorms. We met our friends Beth & Sean at Incredible Pizza that night, and Katie and Ryan had a blast playing all the games. (The adults did too!) They spent the night with us, and Katie and Ryan tried to camp in a small tent in her room. Didn't last long, and they both ended up sleeping outside the tent. Sunday was LOTS of rain, so everyone decided to stay put and hang out at our house. Dan cooked a huge pot of white chili (still using your recipe, Maureen!), and we let the kids watch way too much TV. They were little TV addicts by the end of the day.

The other reason I haven't posted much lately is because I've been feeling pretty crappy. Remember the joint pain I've been mentioning for a while now? I thought it was the new bed we got, so we returned it and got a different one. It helped for a few days, but I'm back to being in pain almost every day. I seem to feel best between 10am and 6pm, when I'm most active. But the evenings and mornings are killing me. And when Jackson wakes at night, I can hardly get out of bed to go to him because my body is in such pain. Sunday night, he was up five times and every time I was almost in tears from just trying to get out of bed. Last night Dan was on duty, so I had to get up only once - when my alarm went off and the day started.

On Labor Day, the pain was so bad that I caved and said I'll go try my chiropractor as a last resort before going to the rheumatologist. (More on the rheumatologist in a moment.) The chiropractor adjusted me and did lots of accupressure on different joints and gave me accupressure tips I could do at home. He also started me on a heavy dose of fish oil called EPA-DHA 6:1, which is basically six times the EPA in normal supplements. From what I understand, studies show that a large dosage of it will help with pain. So I told my chiropractor that I'd try one bottle. After seeing him the first time, I felt better the next two days. But it hasn't lasted, even though I've seen him at least 3 times a week for the last two weeks. I still feel like crap, so I called my rheumatologist last week.

I saw this rheumatologist for the first time in January, after I got some routine tests to check things like my cholesterol and lupus "markers." After my parents' diagnoses (Mom's lupus and Dad's mixed connective tissue disorder) years ago, I've had my levels checked now and then to make sure I'm in the normal range. This time, I was a little elevated. So the rheumatologist ran some more tests, and basically told me I have the markers for MCTD, which is what Dad had. He said I may never show symptoms (I wasn't at the time, except that sometimes it was hard to open a jar of something - my grip wasn't as tight as it used to be), or it could be years until onset. He told me to contact him if I started showing symptoms, and said there's really nothing I can do to avoid getting MCTD. Great news, huh? I called him last week and I have an appointment to see him on Monday, 9/22. I've been avoiding it for as long as possible, maybe because I fear that if I go I'll have to start medication for the rest of my life, or because I fear I'll be diagnosed like Mom or Dad. I really don't want to go down that road, but now I have to admit that I can't keep living like this.

My body hurts, and I'm not enjoying life at the moment. I'm yelling at the kids (yesterday morning had all three of us in tears before the bus came, and I carried a residue of guilt on my shoulders all day long), and I can't pick Jackson up sometimes. I feel old and decrepit, and don't like having to take a break from my normal routine.

So... all of this is to explain why I haven't blogged much lately. (It hurts to type sometimes too, by the way.) And all of this is to ask for your prayers for me. I'm usually better at praying for others and not asking for prayers back, but this time I think I need to be the "taker" and not the "giver." I just need grace to get through the next 6 days until I see the doctor and can figure out what might be wrong.

Thanks, y'all! For listening to me whine and complain, and for your prayers.