My Happy Box

I got a card in the mail yesterday that will go straight into my Happy Box. First, let me tell you about the card. It's from my friend Michelle. She's married to one of Dan's best friends, who he's known since grade school... but not Brad (inside joke). We met each other in college, and have grown a lot closer since they moved nearby and we became mommys. I won't transcribe everything Michelle wrote, but I will quote my favorite line (hope you don't mind, Michelle!): "You leave me with an odd mix of inspiration to do more, be more, appreciate and live more." I read the card and then cried. I was touched that my friend took time from her busy day to stop and handwrite me a note to tell me she loves me.

Sometimes my heart begs the universe for some small sign that I'm not alone, that I'm not unnoticed. Sometimes I just need reinforcement that I'm not spinning my wheels. Sometimes, as narcissitic as it sounds, I just need to know that I matter. My heart was recently crying out these things, wondering if the Cupid's arrows of love and respect that I shoot ever land solidly in anyone's heart, or if they miss the mark and are swept aside. Sometimes I wonder if the effort is worth it. And then I'm reminded that even if no one sees, Someone sees. Right? I tuck that little wisdom into my heart, and keep shooting my arrows anyway. To quote Mother Teresa, "Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you’ve got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway."

So... my heart was questioning a bit lately. And then Michelle's card affirmed my intentions. I needed to hear the words she wrote, and her arrow is now stuck solidly into my heart.

Michelle's card will go into my Happy Box, along with other cards and notes that people have given me. I have cards from years and years ago from friends I see every day (Beth, Michelle, Dan, Sheryl), ones I don't see as regularly (Sarah, Kerry, Catrina, Linda, Teresa) and family too (Mary, Catherine, Maureen). The box itself was a gift from my grandmother when I was a little girl, and I loved that it had a lock on it and I could stash my treasures in it. Funny how the treasures have evolved from seashells and ribbons to words and paper.

I look through my Happy Box from time to time, but I realize I don't do it often enough. It's not that I need an ego boost (although that's always nice). It's just that sometimes I like to hear that I'm loved. Don't we all?